Ma's Room: Blog 1

Context: Ma is Jack’s mother and the reader interprets everything about her through Jack’s eyes. Ma has been trapped in Room for 8 years, and she has been hoping to escape and give Jack a better life than the one he is living. She only refers to Old Nick, their captor, as ‘him’, something I credit to her immense distaste for him. She devises a two plans to help her and Jack escape Room, but the first does not work. For the second plan, Jack is to pretend he is dead so that Old Nick will take him out of Room in a rug. He is then to crawl out of the rug, jump out of the back of Old Nick’s truck, and get help. All this happens while Ma waits – alone and afraid – in Room, praying for a rescue. I used quotes from the characters in my adaptation to make it as close as possible to the original version.

            The door slams shut behind him. I sink to the ground, feeling all hopes of escape leaving my mind. The pain, loneliness, and fear I am feeling is one of the most intense episodes I have faced since Jack came into my life. Jack looks at me with the most innocent and sweet pairs of eyes that this world has to offer.

“Ma?” he asks softly. “Did I mess up pretending?” These words make me start to smile. “No, you were a star.” I promise him. The wheels in my head have begun to turn again. If sickness isn’t enough to get him to cave, what is?

Jack is mad. He wanted to ride in the brown truck, but he doesn’t understand the seriousness of the situation we’re in. It can be infuriating to explain things to Jack sometimes because he doesn’t understand the outside world like I do. Room is all he’s ever known… he deserves more than that.

“C’mon JackerJack,” I chide him. “Let me show you Plan B.” He frowns at me.  “I don’t want to hear you stinky stupid plans.” This is going to be harder than I thought.

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            Jack is finally starting to get the hang of unrolling the rug from around him. “What if he opens Rug?” Jack asks. “Just to look at me dead.” I consider this for a moment.

“You know how hitting is bad?”

            “Yeah.”

“Well, tonight is a special case.” I tell him, scanning Room for anything that Jack can use as protection. I pick up the smoothest knife we have and look at its shiny blade. “If he tries to attack you do anything you possibly can. Kick him, bite him, and poke him in the eyes. Anything at all so you can get away.”

            “Am I allowed to kill him?” Jack asks. I decide to let that one slide. 

“Do you think you could hold this tight, inside the rug, and if–” I stop dead in my sentence. What has gotten into me!? Giving a knife to my one and only joy in the world!? “Never mind.” I say.

Jack begins to take off his socks. “No,” I tell him. “Keep the socks. Otherwise the street might be sore on your feet.” Tears begin to sprout in my eyes, and I quickly brush them away.

Jack holds my lost tooth in his sock, and the note in his underwear. I sing him our favorite songs and stroke his hair, giving him as much sweet time together as possible. I am terrified to let him out of my sight, but this might be his –our– only chance. “It’s time.” I tell Jack.

He looks so afraid lying in the rug. I’ve never seen him look this way before. What if I’m making a big mistake? No – I can’t turn back now. I stare at my precious angel, and the tears begin to well up. I can already feel the emptiness expanding in my chest.

“What?” Jack asks. I lean down and press my forehead to his. He gently grabs my hair, and we just stay like that for a while. I lean back onto my heels and gently whisper “See you outside.”

I roll Jack up and we just sit for a while. I rest my hand over where I believe his forehead is and let the tears come. I want him to see them and believe us. I wonder what must be going on in Jack’s head right now. Is he scared? Anxious? Excited? I almost ask him, but quickly catch myself. I don’t know when he will arrive and if he hears anything the plan is toast.

“Is he coming?” Jack whispers. “How could he not?” I ask. “If he’s the least bit human…” I trail off. 

We sit some more. “Ma?” Jack asks in the tiniest whisper. I can feel his fear. “Right here.” I assure him. “Always.”

            Beep beep goes the padlock. I press my hand into Jack, hoping, praying, for a miracle. I need him to be strong. He walks in, and puts a bag on the table. Antibiotics, he says. “You didn’t come back.” I say, making my voice strangled and weak. “He got worse in the night and this morning he wouldn’t wake up.” He stares at me, horrified. He asks me if I’m sure and I scream that I am. “That’s just terrible,” He stammers. “You poor girl, you–”

            “YOU KILLED HIM!” I wail. I demand he bury Jack, anywhere but here. He obliges, and goes to grab Jack. “You mustn’t disturb him.” I growl. He promises not to unwrap Jack, and picks him up in the rug. I feel my heart lurch as the door opens, then closes. Just like that they're gone.

            Suddenly, I begin to panic. Without Jack here there's nobody to be strong for. Sobs rake my body as I fall onto the floor, not seeing, feeling, or thinking. I feel as though I’ve lost everything holding me to this world, as the most intense pain I have ever felt surges through my bones. I must trust in my baby – he will save me.

            How much time passes? I feels like years. I sit on the floor, clutching Jack’s hoodie to my face. It still smells like him. Dread seeps through my veins like an icy waterfall. Suddenly, the sound of screeching tires appears from the distance. Him. He’s back. I brace myself for the world of pain and torture he is about to inflict on me. Will he even let me live after this? BOOM.

            The door blows open. Jack’s in the police car. I race to him and grab him out of the door, clutching him to me as I fall to the ground again. Jack is shaking and I am sobbing. He's bleeding on one hand and his hair has fallen loose from its braids. Free. We’re finally free.

“We did it.” I smile at him.

            “I kept messing up the plan.”

“You saved me,” I whisper to him. I hold him close, never to let him go again.